Hey guess who saw yet another house she could totally live in today? That would totally be me. Guess who's getting a key to her apartment on the 24th? Also me. Hey, same girl? getting a POD delivered shortly to haul my shit away. Same girl? Her Kid turns nine in two days and she's taking him to Disneyland for several days in a row, as he has not been since he was two.

Same girl? EXHAUSTED. *flomp* HOW ARE YOU.

The Kid and I (Oz came along for moral support and a third pair of eyes, which was useful quite a lot) saw four houses yesterday, three of which were in a totally old and somewhat run down neighborhood. Funny thing about that neighborhood is that it totally reminds me of where I grew up (and where my mother still lives). :P So, not opposed to the area on GP, but dude. Most of the people I work with wouldn't come to a housewarming party. *sigh* To be fair, I'm almost thinking I'd rather deal with a townhome elsewhere than a house there. Damn, dog, what hypocrites we all are.

The fourth house on the other hand was perfect. 10 miles further from work than where I live now, but still well within reason for commute, and, omg. fucking perfect. 3 bedrooms, yard, garage, in an area of town I know and could totally live in; it's like a bloody fairy tale. (Shh. I have low standards.) It's right on the outside edge of what I can afford, but afford it I can. Of course, there will probably be a metric asston of bids on it by tomorrow (saturday was the first day that it was available for showing), and as a result, my realtor is not confident that even bidding a bit higher than asking would work out. *sighsomemore* Anyway, cross your silly fingers. In the event of magical flying swine delivering good news, I believe I shall weep. :P

In peach rescue news, it appears the gardeners relieved the lonely neighbor tree of its remaining fruit, as not only was the silly thing mostly naked today, it was tended, broken branch trimmed and tied up. So, no more free peaches, but I continue to thank it for my newfound love of jam artistry. mmmjam. fish_echo suggested that I use it as gifts to everyone and their mother, though I have to say, being the dork that I am, I was already handing one to like, everyone I know. :P Oz went so far as to eye the pile jealously, even though it still takes up a good quarter of the kitchen table. Apparently this means we should go to a pickyourown farm or something. Y'know, in the next like, three weeks. But still.

Moving is slow and depressing. It's also a lovely way to get rid of a ton of crap. Craigslist curbalerts left and right, ebay marathons and handing off piles of things to the neighbor kids has made a dent in my stuff-filled existence, but you just can't shrink the number of books I own. Seriously, good fucking god. Speaking of craigslist, I'm thinking of hiring some of the cheap mover guys for shlepping the shit back and forth this time because Oof. exhausted. and that's just from the emotional/mental prepwork this time. imagine the actual moving bit?

skinny dipping in my neighborhood is actually closer to chunky dunking, but that doesn't make it any less naked.

I am finally out of peaches. Final count:

Plain peaches preserved in light syrup: 5 quart jars and 8 pint jars
Peach jam: 6 half pint jars
Peach-Pineapple jam: 7 half-pint jars
Peach-Strawberry jam: 1 pint and 6 half-pint jars (one of which contains a whole strawberry that came from MY OWN STRAWBERRY PLANT OMG)
Fruit Punch jam (my own creation-- a blend of peach, pineapple, strawberry & nectarine and btw, I tasted this and it's beautiful): 1 pint and 10 half-pint jars
Peach Honey (much akin to syrup, made from the skins of the fallen peaches): 2 half pints

TOTAL: 5 quarts, 10 pints and 21 half pints of AWESOME.

...I am exhausted. Also, WTF am I going to do with 15.25 quarts of peach product? :P OOPS.

In other news, I was pre-approved for a home loan, and I have a meeting with a realtor tomorrow. :) I wish I'd thought of this earlier, seeing as how I still have to find an apartment in between. UGH. I wish my mommy lived in SD. I'd have somewhere to stay for a few months while the house is sorted AND a motivation to GTFO after just a few days. BRILLIANT. :P

Also, the internet taught me to can peaches, which was awesome, since we took about 40 pounds of the most beautiful, ripe, luscious, goldenpink ripe peaches off of a peach tree across the street in the backyard of a vacant house. FORTY. And there are about 15 more sitting around waiting to be ripe enough for us to pick (I'm guessing this weekend). We ended up with five quart jars and eight pint jars of preserved peaches, six pint jars of peach jam, two pint jars of peach honey and a huge tupperware of peeled peaches in the fridge that I am about to turn into peach-pineapple and peach-strawberry jam. it was sort of a lot of messy work, but damn, dog. It was cheap, awesome, really very satisfying labor, and it turned out shelves full of food where I know *EXACTLY* where it came from and what's in it, and! They're pretty. And we stood around in the kitchen listening to BB King, Eric Clapton, Nine Inch Nails and Radiohead while we did it. Seriously, for how modern and badass I am and whatnot, every domestic art I learn is just as awesome as the last. WHO WANTS TO TEACH ME TO KNIT?! WHOA. I gotta draw the line somewhere. :P


How did we find the peach tree you ask? Well, see there was a branch overhanging the concrete wall separating the yard the tree is in with the yard of the *other* vacant house across the street. You know-- the one with the pool that The Kid, Oz and I crashed on Sunday. :P That one. (speaking of awesome)

1) Like I said to darthfox earlier, I have attempted to come back to my LJ several times over the course of the last few months and continue to fail. Likely, this will continue to be the case, but here I am! Como estan, kids?

34) Took teh Kidness to Knott's Berry Farm last Tuesday and had a blast. Kid had never been and I hadn't been since before he was born... which, incidentally will be exactly nine years ago in about two weeks. Nine. NIIIINE. That's one less than double digits and halfway to college. Excuse me, please, I think I need a drink. I believe when I started my LJ, he was... three? -ish? Wow dude. Wow.

987) Bksy tagging me in a facebook meme also moved me to reexamine my body of work *snert*, and I randomly came across this and this and this and omg. A host of other entertaining memesheepery that makes me wonder about the good stuff I've missed. What other entertaining memes did I miss, dudes? I'll totally do them.

30924) I am shopping for a house. On the upside of being employed as a corporate tool, I have proven myself to be an invaluable corporate tool and thus am moderately assured of continued employment (or at least as much as anyone can be at the moment) and well. With the way real estate has taken a nose dive as of late, even on unemployment, I could probably make the kind of payment I'm looking at. In Southern California no less! (See, we all talk about the zombie apocalypse, but I think pretty much we're seeing the zombie apocalypse already, just with less shambling about in search of brains and more shambling about in search of the green and getting violent and cranky over the slim pickings.)

8758925) My kid will be nine in two weeks. No, seriously.

69509854) Oz is playing Fallout 3. Have I ever mentioned how when I was a kid, I was totally terrified of nuclear war and zombies? Why do you suppose the most popular games in the house here are based on both these things?

askjhfehtwlthweirhwery) OMGJUICE I HATE YOU EXCEPT FOR HOW I DONT. She's making me read a cracktastic epic that is just win. :P STOP TWISTING MY ARM OW. never leave me omg

Yep. I refuse to write a sex scene without emotion. *SNORT* no seriously, Love, hate, anger, jealousy, a keen thirst for revenge; those count, right?

Ok, we went out for Thai instead, then came home and had fruit sorbet. :P (Oz is still not done with finals, so no hangovers for him.) And played L4D (though playing xbox live with strangers is always such a mixed bag. ugh.)


HI EVERYONE. I JUST FINISHED THE CLASS THAT I NEEDED TO GRADUATE FROM COMMUNITY COLLEGE AFTER ROUGHLY A HUNDRED YEARS AND GO ON TO SPEND ANOTHER HUNDRED WORKING ON THAT BA.

*renames lj to be 'tortoisegirl'*

IN CONCLUSION, PUPPIES. Now it's time to work. khfdjLKGHLG

Today is the last day of my online Assembly language class. How do you have a last day in an online class you ask? well. I have until midnight to finish the 70-minute, 46-question final. Each question is worth two points and all I need are 40 points to pass the class and never take assembly language again. It doesn't sound hard, but then again, I hated this class with a burning, slobbering, towering passion unrivaled by any class I can think of to date, to the point of boycotting the final project because I had enough points to theoretically get by. Theoretically. (It really was a boycott and not laziness, I swear. The shit he wanted us to do was impossible and so out of left field it was ridiculous.) Probably not the most intelligent move ever, but principles, man. I have them.

At any rate, I am as studied as I'm going to get. And so I'm going to go take that final.


Any second now.


Like now.

Or now.

...ugh. Ok, now. But after this I'm eating a burger and playing L4D. And probably finding something very interesting to drink, then chasing it down with another.

OY VEY. WISH A HOMIE LUCK.



ETA: HOMG YES. ACED. DONE. WIN. CLASS PASSED WITH A "B". GOING FOR BURGERS. BRB.

In a surprisingly canny move by the PTB, Oz' 360 coincidentally RROD'd just in time for finals.

For those of you that don't speak Xbox, that means that all of the little green lights on our Xbox 360 turned red, forming the notorious Red Ring of Death, which is so common, Microsoft estimates that 1 in 3 360s will eventually experience this issue (fortunately, while other problems with the 360 are covered by a 1 year warranty, the RROD is covered for up to 3).

Meaning also that there is no Left4Dead, Bioshock, Castle Crashers or TVersity to distract from studying.

...thank jeebus for the interwebz.

I came to bring you some AutoTune nuttiness only to find this gem in my inbox Batman's Gonna Kick Your Ass (NSFW); Not worksafe due to copious profanity, so headphones, and you should be ok. Me I couldn't stop laughing. :P

Alright! Back to your regularly scheduled programming.

AutoTune may be the bane of music today HOWEVER, it has as of late given rise to a couple of unspeakably brilliant things. I believe The Destroyer referred to one as "the greatest thing he has ever seen", but that happens a lot. The point here is, they're awesome. SRS.


one slap at a time!
1) Slap Chop -> Rap Chop. I swear to peat, you will not be able to get over this awesome. You will listen to this at least twice, probably more.

Just ask Donkey Kong, he's in my crew
2) Auto Tune the news #2: *SPORFLE* Funny to begin with, hysterical at the angry gorilla, and then the bit on the ice caps is probably my favorite. :))))) Just. Lol.

YES. THIS IS WHY THE INTERNETS WERE INVENTED.

Whoa.

This is tagged 'Best Video I've Seen Today Will Make You Smile' and it is completely correct. Says the accompanying text:

This cover of Stand By Me was recorded by completely unknown artists in a street virtual studio all around the world. It all started with a base track—vocals and guitar—recorded on the streets of Santa Monica, California, by a street musician called Roger Ridley. The base track was then taken to New Orleans, Louisiana, where Grandpa Elliott—a blind singer from the French Quarter—added vocals and harmonica while listening to Ridley's base track on headphones. In the same city, Washboard Chaz's added some metal percussion to it.

And from there, it just gets rock 'n' rolling bananas: The producers took the resulting mix all through Europe, Africa, and South America, adding new tracks with multiple instruments and vocals that were assembled in the final version you are seeing in this video. All done with a simple laptop and some microphones.

The Kid and I just sort of stared at it in awe. Serious, people. Go listen.

Can't talk. Filled with Pocky, sweet buns, cream puffs and the desire to blow something up in the name of science. :P

1) Today I swore at LJ because I couldn't log in, then I realized I was attempting to use my email username. oops.

2) Oz is off halping his maternal unit for the weekend, thus, Teh Kid and I spent the morning working and goofing about (read: reading, playing video games, hosing the dogs off --OMG THE LULZ-- watering plants and cleaning house. Next, we are taking a field trip to Mitsuwa, as Oz and I have made a convert of the Kid, and he is begging for strange Japanese candy like Pocky, Orange gum, bear-shaped lollipops and little cake roll thingums; THEN we're going to come home and watch the two-hour season 7 opener of Mythbusters, in which several things explode spectacularly. WIN.

3) So momebie recommended The Bravery's The Sun and the Moon as a CD for grabbing in a situation of potential score, and find that I agree with your assessment, though the the whistling/hooting in the middle is probably not the best moodsetter *cough*, BUT it's a fantastic CD. Apart from the fact that I love it, when I tried it on Oz, he was like OH I LOVE THIS SONG (to the opener), and when I played several discs this morning for the Kid, this is the only one so far that he says he 'likes a lot!' (you should have seen the dance he was doing in the middle there :P). Nice job, friend!

4) antosha_c, r_instro and tunxeh recommended Dire Straits, so I of course picked up Making Moves and Love Over Gold, and I'm not sure how I feel about them yet. I played them this morning too, and sort of would come back and forth into the room going ooh, i like that *goes out* *comes bacK* err, lolwhut?, etc. So. I'll give them another try on my headphones monday and see what a dedicated listen will do. :D

5) I am wearing platform sandals, in fact the only shoes I own with significant heels that I've worn more than say, twice, as I believe in actually being able to, y'know. Walk. They allow me to go from 5'2" barefoot (*stands proudly with bksncleverness & merrycontrary*) to a whopping 5'6" tall. IS THIS HOW NON-VERTICALLY CHALLENGED PEOPLE SEE THE WORLD? No, probably not, as that is still stupidly short :P No matter, I will still tower over most of the nice japanese people at the Mitsuwa. :P



OFF IN SEARCH OF CANDY WITH INDECIPHERABLE LABELS. BRB.

This and the comedy and wankery surrounding it has filled me with lulz for half an hour. good grief. :))))) (Should that be the signboard of the online fandoms? a set of comedy and wankery masks? and what would a wankery mask look like? eyes rolled up with slack jaw? :))) Oh fandom.

Also NEW L4D map pack, y'all. kdfjal;skgasjgd YES.

DED FROM LAUGHTER AND ZOMBIE KILLINS. MUST SLEEP.

Paaaaacked for catalina this Kidless weekend omg. win!! I love Spring Break. One week for fantabulous family vacation, one weekend for super adult alone-time. *beam*

Also, work has been a big angry polar bear this week. RAR. TOMORROW I RUN AWAY.

So I was listening to Dulcinea today in the car, and found that it made me think some really really interesting thoughts. This is not new. But! It made me want to ask the friend!mass:

Your face is sore from smiling/drinking/making out, your significant other has broken to run to the bathroom/change/throw the dogs out/etc.; you have two minutes to grab a CD, toss it on the player and hit 'repeat' (or you know, queue in the player and press repeat :P). What CD do you choose?

Toad the Wet Sprocket's Dulcinea. It's not romantic, it's not even happy most of the time, but damn. Talk about the intense slow churn. *fanself*

Your turn! What CD did you grab while simultaneously kicking off your shoes?

...I can't quite deal with This level of awesome

Pearl Jam AND DMB AND Silver Sun Pickups AND just... a host of amazingness... IN SANFRAN.

...whut do i dooooooooo

AHHHHHHHHHH. CAN THE SEMESTER BE OVER NAO PLZ. :P

Five more weeks. This class makes me think I don't want to look at the computer's insides any more. :P Oof. /procrastination

Wait! One more whine um. story! Dude can I please be back on Spring Break? :D because OMG that was awesome. We hiked in an Ewok forest, got rained on like crazy, spent the following two days crashing with the Medge and whirlwind sightseeing museums and landmarks, and then drove home to retrieve dogs from the grammalady and holycrap, then it was over. Oi. Oh yes, I was in the SF bay area and forgot to ring antosha_c, whom I would love to introduce to teh Oz as the man who foretold his coming arrival (I spent too long in fandom to let that sentence be :P). durrrr. My Kid, however, spent about a week with his jaw dropped open, so I'd say the trip was a raging success. :) Seriously, I even have photographic evidence... err. somewhere.


No really, why do I want to major in computer science? Someone? Anyone?

Oi, PS: Speaking of travelling, work is sending me to Columbus, OH for two days at the end of the month. Anyone in the neighborhood want to grab a martini or something equally mad?

4C3Dh) WHO CAN I BRIBE TO WRITE ASSEMBLY FOR ME? ANYONE?

35873597) lolllerskates! Teh doggehs are going to be a year old on June 1st. We're SO throwing a birthday party for them. Complete with meatcake. Multi-layered with mashed potato frosting. :P Now someone tell me how they have permission to be a year old? oh no, I know. Right around how teh Kid will soon be nine. Like that. Oz and I are fully convinced we have managed to land in some sort of time vortex. IT IS APRIL, PEOPLE. APRIL. :| So not taking a summer school class. SDSU will be mad enough in the fall. Which omg, have I even mentioned? I got in to SDSU! Again! For the fall! For Computer Science! Which brings me back around to omgwhy?! *headdesk*

'scuse me. I am going to fight every instinct that tells me to go play Left 4 Dead on 360 versus mode and try to go write some more fussy little code. :|

I am currently slow roasting a giant oven bag filled with pork and green chile, cleaning my house, and have repotted my new baby yellow roses and Oz's new bromeliad. (OH NOW YOU WANT TO COME TO MY UNBIRTHDAY, DON'T YOU? DON'T YOU?!) I am also staring at the chewed corner of the sofa with one eye while glaring at a baleful, oh-so-guilty-looking Oscar with the other, and dancing to Bob Marley (though a second ago, it was Jimmy Eat World until the CD turned). I also have Machine Assembly Language Jargon-and-Balderdash open in another (two or four) tabs trying to learn it through osmosis, since I'm clearly not sitting in front of it for more than five minutes at the moment. Oh! and I'm downloading The Big Bang Theory in the RIDICULOUSLY UNLIKELY event that I have a second to check it out, since the awesome juice817 recommends it so highly to me and my houseful of nerds. In the meantime, Oz is out hanging with a small handful of friends after spending the afternoon being paid to taste beer. No, seriously. :P Some people get lucky. A lot. *snert* Wait-- that didn't sound right.

IN OTHER NEWS... hi! So today, I passed --I shit you not-- "Christ's 99 Cent Store". Corner of Euclid and University in SD, kids. :)) holy crap, I could not stop laughing. Don't believe me? GOOGLE STREET VIEW, HOW I LOVE THEE.

...damn it. I should probably go do some more work before the internet eats me. Um. *clings with claws*